standvastig: (Eagle in a snowstorm)
Hendrik ([personal profile] standvastig) wrote2021-02-07 08:57 pm
Entry tags:

Abraxas Inbox

Should any wish to communicate, the opportunity is open. The door has yet to close.
leitstern: (Revolted)

[personal profile] leitstern 2022-02-14 01:44 am (UTC)(link)
[Jasper holds his tongue and listens until others sound out of earshot. Hendrik is oblivious and without a shred of guile. Can he blame his foolish old friend for the calamity that befell the world? He closes his eyes and rubs one in the corner with the tip of his finger. No, he cannot. He can only accuse him of being so blind.

Frightened to touch a sensitive issue, fearing the end of an uneasy peace, he leaves those words hanging upon the air.]


Somehow?

[The world shrivels upon his tongue - his mind finding it bitterly sour.]

I would have expected my oldest friend would notice me being forced aside.
leitstern: (Gratified)

[personal profile] leitstern 2022-02-14 09:31 am (UTC)(link)
[The conversation turns towards private affairs - and he notices his companion searching for an appropiate setting for their discussion. It provokes his nerves and prompts his hands to slide into pockets hidden beneath his robe. The words his adoptive father had shared - they bother him yet had never bothered him at all.

He feels the invisible weight of his pendant, a figurative stone around his neck. It reminds him he believes wrong. There is a reason he kept it close. Some reason Hendrik calls upon his sense of duty. Not that he anticipates much Only a foolish man would expect kindness.]


How so?

[It is an invitation for Hendrik to continue.]
leitstern: (Lost)

[personal profile] leitstern 2022-02-14 10:47 am (UTC)(link)
[Jasper has nothing to declare. What might he say? Why mention anything? He looks aside towards the castle town and finds himself reminded of nights spent watching the sunset back home. Nothing is a better memory - except he cannot stand the sight. His gaze turns towards the floor in thoughtful shame.

It means nobody knows about his anger; his loneliness of rejection hidden away because it might upset others. The decision makes him pause. He wrinkles his nose and directs his gaze back towards the horizon. He turns his focus upon Hendrik after a moment. He watches him sigh and fails to share his own discomfort. Believing he was a disappointment is simple. It helps him focus on the logical reasons for that decision to hide his crimes.

The decision was emotional and pragmatic. It reveals his importance was more than he believed - and that is the most difficult reason to accept out of all.]


I expect you hardly understand why.

[He pauses for a moment to process emotions and face consequences.]

It must have been difficult to accept the deception.

[They hold very different ideas of what saving face means.]
leitstern: (Hatred)

[personal profile] leitstern 2022-02-14 06:22 pm (UTC)(link)
[The opinion he shares is a curious one: analytical and cold in observing the situation. He finds his anger for being treated as though his betrayal matters not - raw and warm and hot - but feels little little after what happened upon the bridge.

He turns his gaze towards the last signs of sunlight. Shows his back to his old friend and reflets on his last words. He desires to claim people should not cling onto something impossible to find. He grits his teeth, tenses his body and exhales loudly.

There is nothing but silence for half a minute.]


If His Majesty had any sense of the situation he would have realised that was the wrong decision to make.

[His tone is fucious but not towards others.]
leitstern: (Foreboding)

[personal profile] leitstern 2022-02-14 07:18 pm (UTC)(link)
[Time drags on. Two seconds. Three. Ten. Twenty sees him reach the limits of his patience - his confusion becoming visible. His eyes narrow. His shoulders roll in discomfort. His brow furrows and his mind struggles to accept a thought floating around in the farthest reaches.

If Carnelian has no memory of him for twenty years, then...

His fists clench while feet spread in a wide stance. He cannot accept this! He cannot accept dying for nothing.]


That is most convenient.

[For himself well as the man in question. His tone, however, is hardly accusing.]

Am I to believe he speaks the truth?
leitstern: (Derision)

[personal profile] leitstern 2022-02-14 08:34 pm (UTC)(link)
[Jasper wrinkles his nose and grinds his teeth. Hands slide away from his hips, arms cross over his stomach. Emotions and lies created over decades refuse to shatter under a convenient truth. It is difficult to change his views after having them warped much of his life.

It is increasingly more difficult to realise the problem. Anger has nowhere to go and coils his body head to toe.]


I can imagine the news came as an utter shock.

[He understands Carnelian would first act like he had on that fateful day. He just cannot accept it so easily.]
leitstern: (Conflicted)

[personal profile] leitstern 2022-02-14 11:17 pm (UTC)(link)
I dare say I am hardly surprised.

[Hendrik looks towards the sky. Jasper looks upon the earth. Lights of dwellings glow amidst the darkness, twisting his expression as he reminices about witnessing the torches of the last bastion. His old friend follows orders without question. It hardly surprises him that he would kneel at the old man's bedside.]

You always were a dutiful soul.
leitstern: (Revolted)

[personal profile] leitstern 2022-02-15 12:38 am (UTC)(link)
[Walls. Windows. Wind. Jasper turns his back on that nostalga; his face twisting in a bitter expression of loss and anger that vanishes with the breeze.

He wonders if he should argue for his feelings or make demands on his old friend's time. Perhaps he should hold his tongue. Perhaps he should head indoors and hide his face.]


I suppose there is nothing else for us to discuss.

[It is agreement more than argument.]